that was fun, let's do it again. And I can come back home at the end of it.

I've always thought this, and it's one of the things the show has been more subtle about maintaining or coming back to. Even in Scarecrow, after their big argument, Sam tells Dean that if Dean wants his help, just ask. And in Shadows, when Sam says, "Dean, we are a family," you can tell that he totally believes that -- that can have the closeness Dean wants despite the distance. The problem is that Dean doesn't comprehend that.

And it makes sense, I think. Dean's got some self-worth/abandonment hang-ups, and the fact that Sam's girlfriend was killed as soon as Dean came back into Sam's life probably doesn't help. Dean, I think, needs Sam to spell it out for him or somehow prove that going to college doesn't mean rejecting Dean. That they can (disregarding whether the narrative will allow it or not) find a balance, because Dean won't get that automatically. Up to now, every time someone's left him, that's it. They just leave, and Dean's easily dismissed, and he doesn't want that to happen again, especially not with Sam.

It always suprises me how happy they both are during that weekend in the Pilot. Like, wow, this could have been a very different show.