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The Many and Varied Adventures of Wee!Sammy.
For those of you who were, for whatever reason, unable to watch that episode (or clips) of ER, I've generously provided a summary of the episode here, complete with screencaps.
This is Sammy. See him here arguing with his father over bow hunting. This is his default expression at age 16. All is going normal in the world of woobie for adolescent!Sammy, when suddenly, THERE'S AN ACCIDENT. THING. Sammy's powers of Brat suddenly tear the space-time continuum and he's zapped through the looking glass and into UPSIDE-DOWN WORLD!
Sammy bleeds a bit, looks pained and somewhat distressed.
(What?? what did you watch the episode for, then??)
Finally, someone in UPSIDE-DOWN WORLD! has the presence of mind to strap Sammy down before he puts someone's eye out with all that... bleedingness and woe.
Sammy finds himself on the operating table, hotass brother and leg-humpingly scruffy father no where in sight. omgNO!
"BITCH YOU DID NOT JUST CUT MY PANTS OFF! My brother is going to KILL YOU ALL!"
Later on, while Sammy is unconscious, some random guy with a receeding hairline comes in and pretends to be Sam's dad. Looking on, Dr. House is unconvinced, as the hotness levels do not match up to suggest any genetic connection whatsoever.
"Yay, sleep! That's where I'm a Viking!"
Not!Dad is overcome with fascination for Sammy's paws and has to nuzzle one a bit. Sammy's hotass brother is going to KILL THEM ALL!
Overcome with the surprising alright-ness of Sammy's hair whilst unconscious in a hospital bed, Not!Dad passes out whilst his hairline tries to un-recede toward the, um, somewhat illegal and still slightly bloodied adorableness.
Always happy to oblige you sickos reading this, the camera pans around to give the moley moley mole some screen-time while everyone else is unconscious.
Then Not!Dad's wife turns up and pretends to be Sammy's Mom. His hair is not fooled. omgNO!
When Sammy wakes up, he pities the Muggles who have attempted to adopt him and his hair and his mole and his ICKLE NOSE while he was asleep, and uses the power of his brain to telekinetically roll his gurney over for a chat.
"Y'all are nice and all, but..."
"Look at this chip on my front tooth. That's Winchester dentistry. No way I could be a Muggle (especially with this hair)."
So then, like a peacock suddenly displaying its plumage, Sammy reveals the full, glorious extent of his magnificent haircut. Flexing his mighty bicep, Sammy releases the Winchester pheremone that will draw Dean to him in an instant.
"K BAI LOLZ!!1"
THE END.
This is Sammy. See him here arguing with his father over bow hunting. This is his default expression at age 16. All is going normal in the world of woobie for adolescent!Sammy, when suddenly, THERE'S AN ACCIDENT. THING. Sammy's powers of Brat suddenly tear the space-time continuum and he's zapped through the looking glass and into UPSIDE-DOWN WORLD!
Sammy bleeds a bit, looks pained and somewhat distressed.
(What?? what did you watch the episode for, then??)
Finally, someone in UPSIDE-DOWN WORLD! has the presence of mind to strap Sammy down before he puts someone's eye out with all that... bleedingness and woe.
Sammy finds himself on the operating table, hotass brother and leg-humpingly scruffy father no where in sight. omgNO!
"BITCH YOU DID NOT JUST CUT MY PANTS OFF! My brother is going to KILL YOU ALL!"
Later on, while Sammy is unconscious, some random guy with a receeding hairline comes in and pretends to be Sam's dad. Looking on, Dr. House is unconvinced, as the hotness levels do not match up to suggest any genetic connection whatsoever.
"Yay, sleep! That's where I'm a Viking!"
Not!Dad is overcome with fascination for Sammy's paws and has to nuzzle one a bit. Sammy's hotass brother is going to KILL THEM ALL!
Overcome with the surprising alright-ness of Sammy's hair whilst unconscious in a hospital bed, Not!Dad passes out whilst his hairline tries to un-recede toward the, um, somewhat illegal and still slightly bloodied adorableness.
Always happy to oblige you sickos reading this, the camera pans around to give the moley moley mole some screen-time while everyone else is unconscious.
Then Not!Dad's wife turns up and pretends to be Sammy's Mom. His hair is not fooled. omgNO!
When Sammy wakes up, he pities the Muggles who have attempted to adopt him and his hair and his mole and his ICKLE NOSE while he was asleep, and uses the power of his brain to telekinetically roll his gurney over for a chat.
"Y'all are nice and all, but..."
"Look at this chip on my front tooth. That's Winchester dentistry. No way I could be a Muggle (especially with this hair)."
So then, like a peacock suddenly displaying its plumage, Sammy reveals the full, glorious extent of his magnificent haircut. Flexing his mighty bicep, Sammy releases the Winchester pheremone that will draw Dean to him in an instant.
"K BAI LOLZ!!1"
THE END.
no subject
*reads past the first three*
*cries with laughter*
I got... nothin'. Heeeeeeeeeeeee!