I discovered another character arc/trait that i absolutely love in any text at all, really - the particular trait in a male character to exhibit strength and wisdom through demonstrating choice... or rather, choosing to withhold physical violence/machismo, because they can recognise it isn't the answer to everything.

( farscape spoilers up to 1.04 )

which segue-ways nicely into ( supernatural 1.15 )

ok, so bear with me while i ramble and untangle by writing it out...


so, today i was struck with an idea. much like i was struck, liek woah, over two years ago, now. but don't fret - i *won't* be doing another fanfiction zine, hah, but my idea is not entirely dissimilar.

ok, so, where to start? how about my thought processes? well, first i started thinking about zines. then i thought about doing a supernatural fanfiction zine, but then i was like "dude, never again, remember?" and besides, i'm not really in the SPN fandom pie like i was in lotrips.

so anyway. then i think about meta. and, hey, wouldn't it be cool to do a SPN *meta* zine? like, a zine full of meta written by fans on SPN. not an academic journal. so then i was like, meh, that's okay - but it's not like it would have recognition or clout of an academic journal.

but. fans have interesting things to say. things that are more often than not bypassed by academia, by the very anthropologists purporting to be studying fans and fandom - or rather, that's it. they behave like scientists studying a foreign subject.

and the internet complicates things. it's difficult to cite experiences and anecdotes from online sources. and any 'authority' on the subject of being a fan are always at least slightly removed - be it by the academic framework, or something worse, like Trekkies - a 'documentary' that exploits some extreme behaviour to create something sensationalist. even Ringers wasn't about the fans... it was about LOTR.

so, like, i'm thinking - what about a 'publication' about fans, by fans? something concrete, hard copy (though it can be online also). but not necessarily full of fans theorising about fandom...

because the problem with academia/public opinions on fans is that the deductions people make about fans always rely on 'demographic'-type material. like, jenkins' whole "middle aged, middle-class, het housewife" assumption. or even the yaoi/manga-is-for teenage girls thing.

being a fan in fandom has convinced me both of the fact that i'm 'not alone' and there are 'people like me', but also that there is so much diversity here - everyone's experience is different and unique, but also all very valid and relevant.

what academia is missing out on are the nuances and relevances of the individual and shared experiences of fans. so, like, why don't fans take control? produce something that can be read and referred to by those studying fandom, as well as a kind of presentation to the general public on the reality of fandom.

in other words, like a documentary, only in written/published format. and not manipulated for editorial opinion.

so i'm thinking. a collection of pieces, written by fans, about their experiences. personal pieces; not necessarily theoretical - pieces maybe between 700-2000 words each, on fans own perceptions and experiences of fandom. with requirements essentially being eloquence and, well, being engaging.

editorially? possibly an editorial committee would be the best route to go by, but essentially i imagine it would be open to submissions, and the 'committee' would just read and choose the best ones. and as much diversity as possible - so it would require a lot of cross-marketing to as many fandom spaces as possible.

and probably published on cafepress again, something to hold in your hand.

so, um. i realise that's all over the place. but, feedback? thoughts? am i making any sense at all? hit me with your thoughts and ideas.

eta for clarification:

will copy & paste from the comments, because i haven't been clear enough ;) :

but my idea with this was *not* to make it about meta - i don't want it to be fans attempting a form of academia. i wanted it to be fans just talking about their personal experiences. so i don't want "fandom provides a militant feminist space for those bourgeoisie enough to afford it", i want "i discovered fandom because i was looking for more that what tv gave me" - i want personal reflection. be it about a particular fandom you're in, or fellow fans, or how it's affected your life.

for example, were i to write a piece, i'd probably talk about how i was isolated, than i discovered fandom. then i got jobs, friends, travel, partners, a shiteload of confidence and wisdom. i wouldn't be extrapolating, just reflecting.