In the tradition of You Know You're Reading A Supernatural Fic When...


5. The Metallicar has an automatic transmission, because Dean isn't the kind of guy who likes wrenching around the gears and stroking her engine so she purrs; he just likes to slide the stick into 'D' and get going.

4. The Metallicar is at least 7' wide, providing ample room for two men over 6' tall apiece to do the horizontal hokey-pokey in the backseat.

3. Speaking of the backseat, it is the depth of at least a single bed, as it allows two rather built men over 6' tall apiece to tussle whilst naked over who gets to top, get off, then spoon whilst horizontal.

2. The Metallicar has a special kind of cruise control; the kind that kicks in and stops her from running off the road and into a tree whilst the driver is getting a blow job.

1. Speaking of the driver getting action, have I mentioned that the Metallicar has a special retractable steering wheel? This is another automatic feature that is initiated when a naked person is wedged between it and the driver's lap.